Days Missed
by bellasaurus-rex
Summary: Bella can't seem to find seem to find herself after Edward left.Ignores most of New Moon.What happens when Jake helps hold her together but seems to go to far to fast and pushes Bella farther than Edward ever has.-Story Forever Incomplete
1. Chapter 1 Home

Bella can't seem to find seem to find herself after Edward left. Ignores most of New Moon.What happens when Jake helps hold her together but seems to go to far to fast and pushes Bella farther than Edward ever has. When Edward returns can he fix Bella after Jacob has broken her farther than she was to begin with? What did Jacob do that pushed Bella over the edge? Or is it to much for Bella to handle?

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the characters.**

Chapter 1-- Drowning at home

I laid here in my bed motionless, thoughtless, in a state of shock

I lay here in my bed motionless, thoughtless, in a state of shock. I still haven't eaten, drank, slept at all since I was brought back here lain in my bed after _he_ left me in the forest ,after _he_ told me he didn't want me anymore ,after _he_ told me he didn't love me anymore. And when _he_ left I felt everything in my body leave with him. I was now empty. Not able to think, to move, to feel, to even let his name drift in my mind without giving into the emptiness even more for he was my everything.

I tuned out all of the of the sounds coming from everywhere other than the inside my head trying to make sense of what had happened ,trying to wake up from the nightmare that had become my life.

Not wanting to give into the nightmare I laid in my bed continually trying to wake up in Edward's arms and for him to tell me it was just a dream and for us to go over to his house and for Alice to dress me up and to play pranks with Emmett and to listen to Edward play the piano again and to feel Esme's cold arms wrapped around me in a hug and to feel the soothing waves of Jasper's calmness fill up my body and to even feel Rosalie's glare bore those two familiar holes in my back again. I loved the Cullens. I loved every part of them; they are what make me whole.

I was now just a cracked and crumbled puzzle never to be put back together again.

It has been a week or so since it happened, I don't count the days any longer because they don't have Edward with me in them. I went down stairs to get something to eat, not that I was hungry for I had no reason to live, but I was sure Charlie would soon be worried.

I finished my bowl of cereal and walked back up the stairs to my room and laid on the bed going back into my emotionless state. Renée opened my door and began packing all of my clothes in my suit case.

"Bella you are coming to live with me in Florida." She said simply as she continued to pack my things.

"NO!" I screamed at her leaving my emotionless state in the dust. I wasn't about to leave Forks. It was my home. I was never one for fits but I let Renée have it, not that she was to blame for all of this. I ran to my suit case and began throwing clothes out of it everywhere. I wouldn't let her take me away from Forks for it was the place where I met _him_, where I fell in love with _him_. This was the place that held my memories of_ him_. I knew if I was going to try to hold onto my memories of him I would have to stay here.

"I can't leave!! No! I _won't _leave!! Forks is my _home_!!" I yelled at her at the top of my lungs. She didn't deserve this but my senses were in the dust with my emotionless state.

"You can't take me away…. Everything I had is here." I whispered, the last part barely audible. And with that I let go, I let go of everything and broke down into tearful, wet sobs muffled by my pillow which I clung to as if it were Edward.

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I knew I had no reason to act like this. I knew I didn't deserve Edward, so why should it matter that he no longer cared for me. It was selfish of me to think he could-no anyone could care for me in that way. Though I couldn't let go of the memories of his voice ringing in my head over and over "I love you Bella." It was like I was drowning in those words and then his words from that night began to drown me and my hopes of his former words farther and farther.

With the passing days of my drowning I would try to live for Charlie. I could tell he didn't like seeing me like this so I tried. I ate. I talked. I slept or tried to at least. Everyday I would plaster on my mask of life and go to school, cook dinner for Charlie and try to make it seem like I had gotten past _him_ but it was hard to make Charlie think I was fine when I woke up screaming every night for my nightmares of Edward leaving again and again. But I tried and though I doubted it I was wondering if I was succeeding.

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AN: So I changed the plot so there is a new Chapter 2 tell me what you think please!!


	2. Chapter 2 Fishing

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight or any of the characters!!**

So this is decided to change the story plot this is the Chapter 2 remake. It is longer now and I hope better.

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Chapter 2- Fishing

I woke up early on Saturday even though I barely got any sleep last night.

I got up and took my bag of toiletries to the bathroom and took a shower before Charlie woke up to go fishing.

After I finished getting dressed after my shower I stumbled down the steps to find Charlie finishing the last bits of his cereal before looking up from his newspaper at me.

"Morning, Bells. Wow, you're up early." Charlie said as he walked over to put his dishes in the sink.

"Yeah. I couldn't sleep well last night." Or any night anymore for that matter.

"Is it okay if I go fishing with Billy today?" I could tell he needed a day out but he didn't want to leave me alone.

"Yeah, do you mind if go with you?" I didn't want to be alone to day either, afraid I might let my mind drift to _him_ for a little to long.

"I don't mind and I am sure Billy won't either. You really want to go _fishing_?" He said looking up to make sure I was serious.

I gave him a weak smile. "Yeah, Dad. I really want to go."

My weak smile stunned him for a second; I couldn't even remember the last time I smiled at him –or to anyone else for that matter. "Okay. You know what I'll call Billy and tell him to bring Jake along too."

I mentally slapped my forehead I just set myself to be set up on a play date with a kid a few years younger than me. But I knew it would make Charlie happy if I actually spoke to someone other than him or Renee. "That'd be great, Dad."

* * *

We arrived at Charlie's favorite fishing hole to find that Jacob and Billy had already arrived with Harry Clearwater. It wasn't a surprise to see Harry there, he always went fishing with Charlie, I just wondered why Charlie didn't mention him being here.

I got out of the cruiser and walked over to help Charlie with the fishing gear- not that I would actually be fishing.

I began to grab things out of the trunk when Charlie took the things from me.

"Bella, I can get this why don't you go talk to Jake." Charlie said handing the gear to Harry before I could grab it back and insist on helping.

"Fine, Dad." I said with a sigh and walked over to Jacob while looking at the ground.

I looked up when I saw Jacob's feet and boy did I have to look up Jacob was tall and I mean _tall_.

"Hi, Jacob." I said softly glancing at his face. There were bags under his eyes he look like he would pass out from exhaustion any second now.

"Hey, Bella it is good to see you." Even his voice sounded tired and to think he had to get up at this early hour to have a play date with _me_.

"I'm sorry you had to get up so early. I didn't realize asking Charlie if I could come fishing with him meant having to wake you up early so Charlie could set up a play date." I whispered looking down at my feet again, the guilt washing over me.

I slowly looked up at Jacob again and he cracked a huge smile. "Oh it's fine I've haven't been on a 'play date' in a while." He said chuckling while making quotation marks when he said the phrase 'play date'.

I light pink blush appeared on my cheeks. I really hoped he didn't take this as a date date. I knew I would never be able to actually date date again. Not as long as I was not all myself.

"I see you have gotten taller haven't you Jacob?" I said trying to change the subject quickly.

"Yeah I have also gotten older. If you haven't noticed that either." Jacob stated patronizing me.

"Thank you for the update Jacob I hadn't noticed." I was glaring at him now. He acted as if he was older than me.

He chuckled looking down at me as if I was a child "A bit snippy are we?"

"Yes actually I think _we_ are snippy. Thank you." I turned away and began to walk towards Charlie.

Jacob grabbed me and spun me around. I flinched slightly to his touch he was extremely warm. "Woah take a pill." He said as he released my arm.

"Oh, I'm sorry Jacob. I was being rude." I said looking at my feet again taking my arm back. "Come on let's go catch some fish." I said walking away over to Charlie and his buddies who had already begun fishing.

I grabbed a fishing poll and began to fish trying to ignore Jacob but I could feel his eyes on me for the rest of the day.


	3. Chapter 3 Pizza

AN: Thanks for the help BellaXXMarieXXCullen!! (totally stole my pen name) Jk But still thanks for the Help!! Now I decided not to leave it at a cliff hanger because I won't be able to update again until most likely Monday cause I am holding a goodbye party for my friend who is moving away soon so I won't have a chance to work on the story. In other news 2 people have favorited and put alerts on this story!! fan girl squee THANKS!! I will try to update this weekend but it most likely WILL NOT happen. But thanks for reading!! PLEASE REVIEW AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!!

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight or any of the Twilight characters!!**

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Another week passed and Charlie and I had had dinner with the Black's 3 days out of the week. We would all eat dinner before the game came on and once we all had finished dinner Charlie would shoo me and Jacob up to his room on another 'play date'.

Jacob would try to start up a conversation with me once we were up in his room and I would give him a weak smile every once in a while, hoping he would mention to Charlie that I would smile.

And for the fourth time this week we went over to La Push to eat at Billy's and for another one of my 'play dates' with Jacob.

I quickly finished my slice of the pizza Billy ordered before anyone other than Jacob and excused myself from the table telling Charlie that I was going for a walk down on the beach. I practically ran out the door trying to make it out before Charlie could object. Once I was out the door I headed down the path to the beach to think.

I arrived at the beach a few minutes after sunset. I took off my shoes and laid them out of the reach of the water. I began to walk along the edge of the water, letting the sand fill the space in between my toes.

Moments after I let my feet touch the water my mind began to drift to Edward. His smile. His voice. All of his God-like features flooded my brain. And before I could do anything to stop them tears poured over the edges of my eyes.

I shivered as the sun began to fall beyond the horizon. The tears continued to soak my cheeks with wetness as I sat down on the edge of the water letting the warmth of the ocean warm my body. I began to feel myself slowly drift to sleep. I laid down on the edge of the water letting the warmth of it consume me.

The warm ocean water began to fill my nose but I didn't stop it, there was no point I was already empty why not let the water fill me inside. I could feel my lungs begin to burn as I filled up with water but I didn't stop it. It hurt but it was nothing compared to the pain I had been in for the past month, two weeks, and three days. (AN: That was a totally random amount of days) Though I didn't stop the water I wanted to. I wanted Edward to come save me and tell me everything would be alright and that he loved me but I knew better than to think it actually would happen. I slowly began to drift away from my situation and began to drown in thoughts of Edward until I was sure I had left consciousness and then I thought of nothing. And I was just at the bottom of a deep pool of water.

I could feel myself beginning to resurface in the deep pool. I could see nothing but I could feel myself being pulled towards the surface and within what felt like seconds I was above the water. I could hear someone coughing and someone who seemed to be shouting "Bella!! Bella, please, please wake up!!" And I began to wonder who's Bella? And why is she asleep? But soon I began to realize I was Bella and I was the one asleep.

I dragged my eye lids open to see Jacob leaning over me cradling me against his chest. He eyes were full of anxiousness and worry. He pulled me in closer to his warm chest as he gazed down at me "Bella! Oh, thank God you're okay Bella!"

"Jacob?" I questioned as I shivered hugging his chest, he was _so_ warm.

"Oh, God Bella what the hell were you doing? I just found you here _laying_ in the water letting yourself _drown_ while you mumbled something like 'Dead. I'm better off dead.' What the hell was going through your head?" I was shocked at the way he seemed so concerned.

"You saved me Jacob?" I questioned him again.


	4. Information about chapter 4

**AN!!:**

Okay so thanks to everyone that has read, favorited, and or put alerts on my story

Okay so thanks to everyone that has read, favorited, and or put alerts on my story!

So I will make it a point to update TODAY!

I am a bit of a procrastinator and I have been reading other people's fanfics and……playing online games…… sorry……..

But I have been working on the next chapter…..some I have maybe half of it done or around there but I will finish the chapter and post it TODAY!

So maybe by 5 or 6….or 7 this evening I will have the next chapter up! Be prepared!

BellaxMariexCullen


	5. Chapter 4 Sleeping

**AN: I am so sorry it took so long!! I procrastinated all week! But I couldn't figure out how to end this chapter! so I continued and continued and I promised to have it up today so I did my best! BTW this is a BxE story I just haven't gotten there yet! Thanks for all the support!! I will begin working on the next chapter tonight or tomorrow! And just so you know I worked on this all afternoon and didn't stop for lunch so READ AND REVIEW!!**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight or its characters!**

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Jacob looked at me as if I was insane. He grabbed one of my wrists and held it in front of my face.

"I thought that was obvious. I mean come on do you really think I would have let you drown? And seriously do you look dead?" He waved my hand in front of my face. I was so glad I wasn't dead. How could I have even thought that? Charlie needed me and it would tear Renée up if I died. No matter how big that emotional hole in my chest got I could never leave Charlie and Renée, not like that.

"Thank you, Jacob." I looked into his eyes to tell him I really meant it. I shivered again as the cold wind blew, I was still in wet clothes.

"I could never just watch you die, Bella." He watched me shiver for a moment before he put the pieces together in his head. "We had better get you out of those clothes."

He stood up still cradling me in his arms against his warm chest.

"I do know how to walk you know." I said to him as he began to walk up the path back to his house.

"Ah, yes but the key is to know how to walk without falling down." Jacob cracked a huge grin as a light blush appeared on my cheeks but I didn't want him to see so I hid my face in his warm shoulder.

We walked the rest of the way up to Billy's house in silence when I realized I had no idea what I would tell Charlie about my wet clothes.

"What are we going to tell Charlie about my wet clothes?" I asked Jacob looking up into his eyes.

"Well the ocean is pretty big and wet. We can tell him you fell in it. You have to agree with track record, it is absolutely possible." He chuckled with a smile at the thought of it, I could tell.

Jacob walked up the steps of his house and we could hear Charlie and Billy inside talking about the game.

"I think you should put me down now Jake. I don't think Charlie would enjoy seeing me like this, you know in your arms." I told him before he opened the door.

"Well we'll see what he thinks." He said as his grin got larger and he opened the door, holding me tightly against his chest as I glared at him. When we walked in Charlie glanced over at us and his drop fell as Jake's grin got even bigger, it was touching his eyes now.

"H-hey k-kids.." It was funny seeing Charlie at a loss for words. He didn't know what to make of my position at the moment.

"Hey, Charlie," Jake gave him a short wave before replacing his hand around me, still holding me against his chest. I had to admit is felt good to be against his chest he was very very warm and his chest was soft but very muscular, I could feel my body pressed up against his abs.

"Hey, Dad," I said glancing at him from the corner of my eye he still looked a bit confused.

"B-bella f-f-fell down in th-the ocean." Jake said through muffled laughter, I could tell he was getting a kick out of this.

"That is why I'm wet Dad." I explained hoping to clear _something_ up in his mind.

"Oh. Um.. We should get you out of those clothes. Is she hurt?" Partially talking to me and partially talking to Jacob. I knew he meant physically hurt, I could tell he was wondering why Jacob was _still_ holding me. Jacob was about to answer him but I interrupted him.

"No. I am not _hurt_. But Jacob refuses to put me down." I answered him as I glared at Jacob. Then Charlie gestured for Jacob to put me down and he _finally _place me on the ground only for my legs to forget how to work and me to fall to the ground.

"Maybe you should sit down for a bit Bella." Jacob said with a chuckle as he caught me right before I hit the ground.

"No. Um it's okay my legs are just a little stiff." I replied as the heat flooded to my face and I leaned into Jake for the support I needed until I got feeling back in my legs.

"Let's go get you some dry clothes." Jake said practically dragging me up the stairs to his room. He placed me on his bed as he began to dig through his closet for something for me to wear. He tossed me a t-shirt and a pair of what looked like _really_ old cut off jeans.

"I haven't worn those jeans since I was nine so they should fit." He said as he walked out of his room leaving me to change. I took off my stiff clothing and put on the t-shirt and jeans. The shirt was a bit large because Jake was a _tall_ 16 year old. (AN: I don't know if he is 16 or 15 cause he is not an important character to me so get over it!) But he was right the jeans fit perfectly, it was odd he was small as a young child.

I laid down on Jake's bed once I finished changing and noticed the sweet husky smell of his sheets. It smelled so good. I felt so tired and his smell was so intoxicating that I drifted to sleep, my head atop his pillow.

When I awoke there was light streaming through the curtains of Jacob's window. Wait. _Jacob's_ window. I shot up into the sitting position to see I was in _Jacob's_ bed wearing _Jacob's_ clothes in _Jacob's_ room. I got out of his bed and rushed down the stairs to find Jacob sleeping on the couch softly snoring. I tripped on my way to the kitchen hoping to find Charlie so we could go home. My body made a loud thud on the ground which caused Jacob to wake.

"What? No I wasn't making out with a bloodsucker!" Apparently he dreamt about vampires too. (AN: Bella already knows that Jacob is a werewolf.)

"Oh Bella!" He said when he realized he wasn't asleep anymore and that I was lying on then floor like an idiot who had just tripped over the air. Again.

"Morning, Jake, sorry I woke you." I said as he helped me stand up.

"No, it's fine I was done sleeping anyway." He replied as I looked around for Charlie.

"Do you know where Charlie is?" I asked Jacob, wondering why I slept in _his_ bed last night.

"Oh he left early this morning to go fishing with Harry and Billy again. He didn't want to wake you last night 'cause he thought you seemed pretty out of it." He said walking into the kitchen over to the refrigerator, taking some juice out of it.

"Oh. Okay. I'm sorry I took your bed." I said as a light blush appeared on my cheeks.

"No it's fine. I never realized how good my bed smells thanks for the update." He chuckled softly; I obviously said something about it in my sleep.

I didn't know how I was going to explain it so I stuttered a few variables before he interrupted me.

"I didn't know I was that hot either but you seem to know _a lot_ more about it than me." I knew that I was sleep talking about his temperature but I wasn't about to damage his ego like that.

"Apparently I am a lot _hotter_ than Edward ever was." He continued. I had totally forgotten about the emotional hole in my chest but with that it felt like it had been ripped open when it had already been sown back together and I could feel the thread being ripped through my skin with his every word. He had gone too far with my sleep talking he had brought up Edward. Everyone had been kind enough to never talk about him, in front of me, let alone say his name out loud in front of me. I could feel the tears come to my eyes and the shortening of my breath as I ran out of Jacob's house letting the memories tear the emotional hole more and more.

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AN: This is not exactly how I planned to end the chapter cause I didn't really plan how to end the chapter but it ended this way. I think in the next chapter I am going to make Bella get really close to Jacob so he holds her broken heart together but then he goes to far when she agrees to be his girlfriend and tells him that she loves him because she is afraid if she doesn't he won't hold her together any more and that is when he goes to far so tell me what you think of the idea! Cause if I use this idea Edward will be coming in the next chapter! fan girl squee and you **know** you want Edward!! Read and Review please!! I have made a poll for the plot for the next chapter so VOTE!!


	6. Poll

Okay so I have put up a poll on my profile so you can decide when Edward will come in! so Vote cause if you don't vote I can't write more and I NEED SOMETHING TO DO!! SO **VOTE!!**

OKAY! I AM NOT GETTING VERY MANY VOTES ON THE POLL SO I HAVE DECIDED THAT IF I DON'T GET ANYMORE VOTES ON IT TODAY I AM GOING TO BRING EDWARD INTO THE STORY IN THE NEXT CHAPTER!! BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT THE MAJORITY WANTS SO FAR AND I WANT TO WRITE THE NEXT CHAPTER SO VOTE!! IF YOU DON'T WANT EDWARD IN THE NEXT CHAPTER!!

Please and thank you

BellaxMariexCullen


	7. Chapter 5 Lies of Love

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Okay it is here!! Chapter 5!! R&R!!

Chapter 5--Lies of love

BPOV

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I ran. I don't know how far I ran or how long. I just ran. I listened to my heart beat pound in my ears as my mind flashed images of the ending of my happiness in my head. Over and over again.

I ran 'til I could no longer run. I fell to my knees and looked up at where my legs had taken me. Through tear filled eyes I gazed at the Cullen house, or was once so the Cullen house. I mentally kicked myself for bringing myself here because of all the good times I had here and knew I would never have again.

I curled up into a ball on the ground and let it all come back to me. I knew I couldn't hold it all in me any more. I knew it was stupid to try but that didn't stop me. But now I was here: curled up in a ball crying in front of my love's old home.

I don't know how long I was there crying in a little ball but it was dark before I heard Charlie's cruiser come up behind me.

"Bella!" Yelled a voice I knew wasn't Charlie's but I was to out of it to know.

"Bella!" Called another voice which I was almost sure was Charlie's. I heard the slamming of two doors and the sound of foot steps running up to me.

Some one was leaning over me stroking my hair, like Edward used to do to comfort me. I quickly batted the hand away as more tear fell from my eyes.

"Bella, sweetie, let's go home." Charlie whispered as he tried but failed to pick me up.

It took al of my will power to not say 'I am home' as I wished I could. But I knew I couldn't 'cause it wasn't true. It would never be my home as I wished it was.

"I'll get her-she's freezing go warm up the car." I realized this was Jacob as he put his warm arms around me.

"No!" I struggled to get out of Jacob's arms. He had been so kind to me the past week but what he did this morning had torn me apart.

"Let me go!" I growled as I jumped out of Jacob's arm only to fall on the wet ground. I heard Charlie approach us once again.

"Jake what's wrong?" He said as he helped me to my feet.

"She is angry about this morning." Jacob stated sadly, "Bella, I am very sorry for the things I said to you this morning. I shouldn't have teased you about talking in your sleep."

"You think I ran away because you _teased_ me?" I felt the anger boil in me. How could he have been that stupid to think it was because of that?

"Bella let's just go home. Please just get in the car we can talk about this later." Charlie said dragging me to the car.

"Yeah, we'll talk about this later _Jake_." I said his name like a dirty word, my voice dripping with venom.

We arrived at home a few minutes later. I stormed in the house, still angry at Jacob. I was soon followed by Jacob and Charlie.

"Bella, something's happened down at the station I am going to spend the night there. You'll be fine by yourself right?" I knew nothing happened at the station but I knew Charlie wanted us to work this out so I figured it would be better to have this argument in private.

"Yeah, Dad, I'll be fine." He was out the door and driving away a few moments later.

"I'm really sorry I teased you." Jacob said breaking the silence that had stretched on for a few minutes.

"I am not pissed at you for _teasing_ me Jacob! You can poke fun at me all you want!!" I screamed at him, my voice screeching.

"Then what's the matter?" He said dumb-founded. I had no idea Jacob was so dense. (AN: I have to poke my fun at Jacob some how. Keep reading)

"Jacob! You brought up _him_!!" I screeched, the tears burning in my eyes. I saw realization cross his face.

"Oh, God. Bella, I am so sorry. I didn't even think about what I was saying. Oh, Bella, please say you'll forgive me. I am really truly very sorry, please forgive me…" He rambled on about forgiveness. I knew I couldn't stay mad at him he had been so kind to me, but I let him continue for about five more minutes not wanting to interrupt. (AN: GROVEL YOU LITTLE MUTT GROVEL!! Lol I had to make him beg! . continue)

"I forgive you Jacob. Just please don't do it again." I whispered as I looked at my feet while we stood there in the kitchen now in silence.

"I promise never to do it again." He said walking over to me enveloping me in a gentle, warm hug.

"I'm sorry, Bells." He apologized again, kissing the top of my head with his warm lips.

"It's okay, Jake. I just really need some sleep now." I said breaking the hug and running up to my room, changing into my pj's before running back down the stairs. I lay on the couch, curled up in a ball in Jacob's lap. I slowly drifted to sleep listening to the sound of his breathing.

* * *

Jake and I have been hanging out all the time now. He has been a lot more careful around me now, never mentioning _him_. I now count on Jacob's company to keep myself from having an emotional break down every two seconds. He is like the glue that holds me together now.

I see him everyday now. I always drive down to La Push after school everyday to see him. I have grown so close to him he is like brother to me. I wouldn't be able to take it if he left me too. I had to keep him with me no matter what I had to do, I wouldn't lose him.

* * *

It was a Friday and that meant Charlie would find something to do at the station that would take him all night and most of Saturday so that I would be alone with Jacob for the night. Charlie wanted to see me and Jake's relationship escalate to make-out sessions on the couch and dates every night. Something I was no where near ready for but that didn't stop Charlie from leaving us alone every Friday night until he came home every Saturday evening.

These night usually went the same: 1) I would cook dinner for Jake and I, 2) go take a shower while Jake waits on the couch, 3) Change into my pj's and walk back down the stairs to fall asleep in Jake's lap while he watches the tv or talk until we are both tired and fall asleep. But tonight was different. Very different.

I finished washing the dishes from dinner with Jacob and turned around to see him smiling at me hugely.

"So what do you want to do tonight Jacob?" His smile got larger as he walked over to me. He picked me up and placed me on the counter.

"Bella, I need to tell you something." He said looking deeply into my eyes.

I smiled at him, he usually wasn't so serious. "What is it Jake?"

"Bella. I love you. I love you more than in a friendly way. I am deeply in love with you Bella. Do you...Do you love me Bella?" His eyes were filled with truth and lust. My heart stopped at his words. _No._, I thought to myself, _not in the way he does_. But I couldn't bring myself to say the words. To break his heart. I couldn't do it. What if he left me if I told him I didn't love him. I couldn't be alone again. But I didn't love him in that way so I did what I had to keep him here, with me.

"Yes." I said softly avoiding his eyes. It was the only thing in my mind that made sense. If I didn't want to be alone I had to tell him I loved him.

With in seconds of my words his mouth was on mine. His tongue grazed my bottom lip begging for entry. I allowed it parting my lips a small amount, I told him I loved him I couldn't deny him in any way now. He grabbed my legs and wrapped them around what must have been the lower half a his chest because of his size. Once my legs were secure he picked me up off the counter and carried me up the stairs into my bedroom. He pushed me down on my bed and laid on top of me. He continued kissing me and pushing things farther and farther until we were both had no clothes on and were wrapped up in my blankets. Jacob cuddling me to him. It was almost daylight which meant Jacob would have to leave soon and I could let the tears flow and let the emotional hole, that was now more than twice as big as it was when _he_ left me, take over me. (AN: I really hope you didn't think I would let the 'bad thing' go into lots of detail cause that is something I would never ever ever do! People do not just get naked to sleep do they?! I ppl would know what I was trying to imply there!! Keep reading!!)

Jacob awoke from his slumber with a grumble.

"Morning, Bells," He said kissing the top of my head. I held back the tears and turned over and smiled at him.

"Good morning, Jake," I tried to sound as cheery as he had. He kissed my lips quickly before hopping up to put his clothes on. I layed in my bed while he got dressed.

"Hey, Jake, um I think Charlie might be coming home early today and I want to get caught up on cleaning so you don't have to stick around. How about you go work on the rabbit?" I said softly hoping he wouldn't catch my lie, hoping that I would have today to myself, to cry and let my emotions roam free.

"Yeah I really need to work on the rabbit some more anyways. I want to try and almost finish it today so I will go ahead and leave you to your cleaning." He said kissing the top of my head before heading out the door. (AN: Don't ask how he got home cause I don't really care he just got there! lol okie read!!)

Once I heard him slam the front door I let the tears pour. I walked over to my window and opened it as wide as it would go, as I had always did when I wanted Edward to come in my room, thought I knew it would do no good what so ever. I walked back to my bed and I curled up in a tiny ball and wept letting my mind drift to Edward and how this would have never happened with him but it didn't matter I knew I wasn't good enough for him and I knew he would never come back and stop it.

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EPOV!!

I could no longer stand it!! I had to go see Bella! I had to check on her make sure she was alright! I had to make sure she was living her life to the fullest. I had to make sure Bella was still Bella...

I didn't bother to tell my family of my plans I was sure Alice had already saw me leave before I had even crawled out of my little worthless ball in the corner of my new room. I hopped out the window and ran as fast as I could. I had to see Bella as soon as possible.

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Bella's house looked the same as always, nothing had changed. I hid in the forest next to her house and listened for thoughts of anyone in the house. There was a silence. I figured that Charlie was probably using his Saturday to go fishing and Bella must have been out with her friends. I saw no harm in going up to her window and looking into her room to see if she had changed it any. I climbed the tree in the front yard and saw Bella window was open. I thought about going in when I heard a soft whimpering and the sound of someone sniffling, it sounded as if someone was crying. I wondered, _who would be in Bella's room crying?_ and then I realized _Bella_ would be in her room crying. She was the reason I heard no thoughts, she was alone in her house crying.

I didn't even think about my next move it was pure instinct. I ran through Bella window and took her in my arms as if she was a child and cradled her. I hushed her and told her everything would be alright, as I would have if I never left. After a few moments I realized what I had done. I knew I could just leave now I had to stay and I had no problem with that anymore, I just wanted Bella.

I stared down at Bella as she realized that it was me who was holding here. She gazed up at me with her big brown tear filled eyes and whispered something to me softly though her tear.

"I love you, Edward." She sounded so sad. It almost broke my heart and put it back together at the same time.

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**AN:** So here is the chapter 5!! I brought Edward in cause most people wanted it that way but I made this a really really long chapter so I sort of waited a while I just put all the waiting in one chapter!! lol OK so I will put Bella's POV of Edward's great return at the beginning of the next chapter!! I wanted to write some more but I wanted to leave Edward's response desired! even though everyone knows what it is going to be! But I had to leave something to start back up on!! PLEASE REVIEW!! Tell me what you think of it!! and don't worry I will punish Jacob for his sins later!! lol ok THANK YOU TO ALL WHO HAVE READ AND FAVORITED AND REVIEWED AND PUT ALERTS ON THIS STORY!! JUST TO LET YOU KNOW YOU **ROCK!!** btw sorry for such a long wait! I got distracted with to most awesome guy ever!! But anyways I am ignoring him right now so I could finish this chapter!! SO LOVE IT!! OKAY THIS IS A BXE STORY GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEADS!!

BellaxMariexCullen


	8. Chapter 6 Answers

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight or its characters!**

Chapter 6- Answers!

Sorry it has taken so long!! haven't been in the writing mood!! Sorry!! I've been reading others' fan fics...which takes up some time...sorry...but here it is!! ok so it is 11:30 at night at this very moment so yeah! staying up to write when school starts on Monday and I should be sleeping as much as possible...so yeah you better appreciate it...so here it is!! Chapter 6-Answers!!

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Previously:

_BPOV_

_Once I heard him slam the front door I let the tears pour. I walked over to my window and opened it as wide as it would go, as I had always did when I wanted Edward to come in my room, thought I knew it would do no good what so ever. I walked back to my bed and I curled up in a tiny ball and wept letting my mind drift to Edward and how this would have never happened with him but it didn't matter I knew I wasn't good enough for him and I knew he would never come back and stop it._

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BPOV (right when Edward comes in)

I could almost hear the rustle of the tree outside my window, the sound I heard when Edward was out in the tree waiting for Charlie to fall asleep, but I knew I imagined it, I passed it off as wishful thinking as I continued to let everything I had been holding in out. Through my soft whimpers and tears I was almost sure I could hear the tree rustle some more and I was sure if anything was there it wouldn't be Edward. I could only think of one other person who would come through my window, that was still in Forks, and or La Push. _Jacob._

Thousands of thoughts were running through my head: _what would Jacob do if he found me like this?, would he leave me?, would he make us do **it** again and try to make me **enjoy** it??_. I couldn't get these thoughts out of my head. They only me cry harder.

As I whimpered and sniffled trying to stop the crying I felt a fast breeze come in my window and before I could comprehend what was going on I heard a soft, velvety, anxious, familiar voice hushing my cries, the voice was telling me everything was going to be alright. I slowly realized that familiar voice was the one voice I had longed to hear for the past months. Edward's.

I moved to see his face, gazing up at him with my tear filled eyes and I said the only thing I knew I still felt, the only thing that would ever matter, the one thing that I didn't care if he didn't feel just as long as he knew it.

"I love you, Edward." The tears in my eyes clouding my vision so much I couldn't see his reaction but I didn't care just as long as he knew. (AN: Ok I am stopping here for the night! I know it isn't much but I will continue tomorrow and if I am lucky update it tomorrow after I finish the chapter cause it is now midnight and I am about to drop dead! I know it isn't much but I wanted to show ppl my efforts! And yes I am talking to you as if you are reading it while I am typing it! but anyway I will continue this! whatever this is! This being telling you how much I am writing in a certain amount of time to show my efforts...as little as they may be...anyways continue on reading...even though as I am typing this there is nothing more to read...) (AN: Ok so now I am starting back and it is way no longer the tomorrow I was talking bout yeah sorry my computer charger hated me and stopped working and I had to wait a week for a new one to come in the mail! I just about died!! so yeah sorry!)(AN: So I was going to start writing when I got the charger back but like yeah didn't have anything in mind to write so I am going to start writing some more RIGHT NOW! it is 10:30 pm on Friday September 19th!! Sorry I haven't updated in so long I just have been REALLY busy with school work lately . sorry ok so back to the story)

I gazed up at him trying to desifer the emotions on his face. He looked so tired, though he couldn't sleep it actually looked as if he hadn't slept in years. His eyes, a usual deep burning topaz, were a deep onyx black. His silky pale white skin was replaced with an even paler version of what looked like rough white skin. And his hair. His hair was even messier than usual, its texture looked rough like his skin and you could almost see the tinges of albino white hairs buried under the rough bronze locks.

I could hardly comprehend the word he spoke next for I knew them to be untrue.

"I love you too, Bella! So much!" His velvety voice rang with sincerity. I wasn't sure what happened next, all I could hear was him, Edward Cullen, telling me how much he loved me and how much he missed me and what a big mistake it was for him to leave. I thought it was a dream a terrible tourturous nightmare, it was so good it couldn't have been true.

"Bella." Edward whispered anxiously, staring deeply into my eyes. I couldn't answer him my voice wasn't to be trusted at the moment so I just stared back at him.

"Bella. Bella, love, what happened? Where are your clothes, love?" His voice filled with ergency and love, it only made things worse when all the memories all the horrors came rushing back into my mind.

"Bella. Bella, I love you, Bella. Please tell me what happened, love!" He sounded so angry, so filled with rage, yet every bit rang with love.

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AN: Yes I know cliffie sorta but I wanted to get _something_ posted so this is Bella's POV when Edward comes back in and them some (cause I like that phrase 'and them some' lol) But I will work on it some more tonight and tomorrow but I wanted to get something out there! Sorry it took so long!


	9. Apology Author's Note

Sorry to anyone who was actually reading this story. I don't know why I ever stopped writing for it but I no longer like the Twilight series and haven't read the story in years. If I still liked it or remembered stuff about it I would finish off the story somehow. Again, I'm very sorry I just left the story unfinished.


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